Peaches

     I have a cat. I did not get a cat, but I have one. Peaches found my door and wouldn’t leave. She doesn’t stay all day. She comes and goes as she pleases, but she’s made a home here pretty fast and it feels like I have too. My life is very different today. I’m not sure exactly how it’s become what it has in under two months, but I can’t imagine things any other way. Today is calm. Today has a focus and a direction it never has before. My life blew up and it turns out it was because it didn’t fit. I don’t think it ever did. Things began to change as soon as I left and the universe made sure I would never look back. Possibilities have surfaced and doors have opened that I never had the confidence to knock on before. It turns out not having faith in myself had been holding me down for 30 years. It still hurts and sucks and I cry and yell and miss everything that was, but I also laugh and live and experience and paint art stores and do improv and meet the most outstanding people that live to pursue what drives them. You can say that I saved my life or I ruined my life or I’m wasting my life or whatever way you think fits best. The one thing nobody can say is that I’m not living my life. I’m awake today and I’m never going back to sleep. As with most things in life, whatever circumstances brought me to where I am today, I’m sure it was some me and some not me. But it all swirled together in a mixture of possibility and direction that gave Peaches a new body pillow to nap on. And neither one of us is complaining.